Since I was a quiet and retiring kind, I found that alcohol gave me the confidence to start drinking regularly when I was sixteen. In the beginning, alcohol enabled me, and I took pleasure in my large group of drinking friends and many sexual partners. I never went without a woman, but my drinking and disrespect always led to the breakup of my relationships.
My sexual promiscuity exposed me to STDs like Chlamydia and genital warts, and I used to get into embarrassing situations. I also used to miss a lot of work and drive drunk. You may lose some friends because of your drinking problem’s early stages, but in general, people are understanding and forgiving.
I remember that if I drank more than five pints of beer in one sitting in my twenties, I would have to stop for the night. My body was beginning to suffer from alcoholism, yet I persisted. As long as I didn’t exceed the recommended limit of five drinks, there wasn’t much of a problem. After I reached my limit, I discovered I could continue drinking without worrying about passing out if I switched to spirits. On occasion, however, I would still drink too much and learn that my plan had failed the next day. If you drink too much, your body will give you warnings and a painful awakening, but if alcoholism sets in, you’ll likely ignore those symptoms and keep drinking. I’ve also made several drunken suicide attempts, leaving multiple scars on my arms. Although I was embarrassed by my drinking, I did not stop trying to hide the scars on my arms.
When I drank, I became unfaithful in my relationships because I didn’t care about the consequences of my actions. Eventually, I realized that alcohol no longer boosted my confidence, and I grew more insecure. Over the years, I’ve encountered a few people who were less than impressed by my drinking, but I always assumed they were the ones with the issue. I mean, I never got physically aggressive; I’d say and do some foolish things, but I never thought my actions were severe. Some people at work and home were worried about my drinking, but I persisted in doing it anyhow.
Along the way, I settled into parenthood, eventually having three children, and got my alcoholism under control. Providing for my kids was more crucial than satisfying my cravings at the time. I would continue drinking but limit myself to one large bottle of cider each week and one “binge” every month. I learned how to create alcohol at home and discovered I could do so for very little money at the time. So, I started drinking more heavily again. My drinking got worse at university, what with the cheap beer and the new drinking pals I made as a mature student majoring in computing. Surprisingly, I earned a 2:1 in computer science and immediately found a job in the field. In the late ’90s, while working in IT, I brought home over $1,200 a week. In those days, alcoholic beverages were never prohibitively priced.
Though my drinking problem was causing problems at work and in my relationship, I was prescribed Prozac (an antidepressant) that, when combined with alcohol, rendered me completely drunk. I was “not of this planet” at the time, and as a result, I was fired, my relationship ended bitterly, and my children suffered due to the breakup. Back on my own, my drinking quickly got out of hand; I’d start the day with several cans of potent cider and keep drinking all day. I routinely got behind the wheel after drinking, putting myself and others in danger.
I started an IT company and quickly found I could make a decent living. (Being always slightly drunk, I shudder to think what my customers must have thought of me. But eventually, business picked up, and I was employing four people in no time. I could always buy as much booze as I wanted with work checks, but I eventually became dissatisfied, found a new lover, and relocated to Wales.
Since I could not find a job in the area due to the language barrier, I resumed drinking an entire 2-liter bottle of extremely potent alcohol daily. We were in a codependent relationship, and I was happy to have a partner who condoned my drinking. The association was hard but steady until my insecurities got the best of me, and I started driving intoxicated regularly. I began seriously questioning my sanity when I suspected my partner was having an affair. After intentionally overdosing in 2006, I decided that was it; I would never drink again. Alcoholics Anonymous didn’t help me, so I looked into other options and eventually discovered a method to give up alcohol alone.
In the intervening three years, I have found lasting love, avoided relapse, launched multiple profitable businesses online, and am confident I will never drink again. I’m used to people drinking in the house, and it usually doesn’t bother me until they’re intoxicated. I can empathize with the folks I irritate when drunk because I know now that drunken people are not good company. Having to face my fears without an alcoholic crutch hasn’t made life any more manageable since I quit drinking, but I’m happy now, and things seem to be heading in the right direction.
It’s fantastic, but now I can’t picture my life with booze, when before I couldn’t picture it with it at all!
If you wish to give up alcohol for good, you can learn about the methods I utilized by downloading my eBook. You should take care of this right now if you value your life, your relationships, and your job. It will, without a doubt, prove to be the wisest move of your life. I am proof of such statement.
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Rob Maggs is an alcoholic who has kicked the habit and is now focused on growing. He is a software developer and web designer in Anglesey, United Kingdom (at the address.